Fairy's Strange Junkfood Tribute: Eating Kandos Kiddies, the Anal Retentive Way

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*Eating Kandos Kiddies, the Anal Retentive Way*
by Farah 'Fairy' Mahdzan (19-Jul-2003) \| Readers Say

I am certain that every child who grew up in Malaysia ("Truly Asia!") has nibbled on these Kandos Kiddies chocolate at least a few times during their entire childhood. Kandos Kiddies are small chocolate bars, about the size of a matchbox each. Parents would loudly heave sighs of relief if their chocolate monster kids went from the Toblerone shelf to the section where the sundry shop kept Kandos Kiddies. After all Kandos Kiddies was only 10 sen a piece and a hefty bar of Toblerone chocolate probably cost as much as a whole chicken that could feed a family of five for a day back in the 1980s.

This all-time low price of 10 sen for a piece of Kandos Kiddies is still so today in 2003. Even if you didn't like the chocolate (which actually tastes quite pleasant, in a cheap "10 sen" sort of way) just looking at the vibrant and colorful illustrations printed on the wrapper was already worth 8 sen.

Now, I am pretty organized when I do certain things, and the way I ate Kandos Kiddies chocolate is included in the list. First, I would gently unwrap the Kiddies chocolate from its silver cocoon; doing this will reveal this rather tiny but tasty chocolate morsel:

See how the chocolate bar is sectioned into 4 equal parts that meet the diamond with the Kandos branding in the middle? Well I would carefully break off each of the 4 main segments, gobble them up and leave that chocolate diamond in the center like so:

I would always leave that chocolate diamond for last, as though eating Kandos Kiddies that way was going to magically ensure that I don't fail my standard one Bahasa Malaysia spelling quizzes every week ("a-y-a-m, ayam!"). Even for this junk food review, I found myself subconsciously breaking the chocolate bar apart according to its corner segments before I gulped up the diamond portion last! I guess some old habits are hard to break.

Interestingly enough, after a casual conversation about junk food with my colleagues who are about my age, they too admitted that they ate Kandos Kiddies chocolate this way! See, I wasn't the only kid who grew up having such an anal retentive way to eating chocolate.

If I had to give out an award for world's cutest chocolate wrapper, I'd present it to the makers of Kandos Kiddies. Kandos Kiddies were some of my favorite chocolates because of the cartoons drawn on the wrapper. I suppose there is some truth in advertising experts' claims that attractive packaging implies a good product and influences one's desire to purchase it.

But of course I didn't know all that marketing psycho mumbo jumbo back then. Like any six year old who had enough cognitive abilities to appreciate art, I just enjoyed looking at pretty pictures and liked eating chocolates a whole lot. Heck, you could have slapped a cute cartoon wrapper on stale bread and I'd probably still eat it. As a kid I mean. I'm good at reading expiration dates now, so you can't fool me today. Hah.

Here's a look at some of the cartoons that are printed on today's Kandos Kiddies wrappers:

"Kiddy Playground"

This cartoon is very representative and universal of every civilized childhood. Which little girl or boy didn't enjoy a casual stroll to the playground to have a go at the buaian (swings) or experience the exhilaration of going down a slide?

"Shooting Cowboy"

This one's tinged with a little bit of old-fashioned American stereotypical characters from the wild wild West. You've got a kid dressed up as a Red Indian gleefully waving a pointy arrow and bow, a cowboy and some kid riding a tricycle. But honestly, I'd be disturbed if I had a friend point a gun to my head every time we played together.

"Fearless Jogger"

Now, I have never seen a kid so composed and calm while being chased by a mad dog! So cool, so brave, so nonchalant! He's definitely my Kandos kid hero.

"Blind girl?"

Yet another bizarre Kandos cartoon. Were you supposed to be blind folded when you played ketinting (hopscotch)? Or is this just another perverted way to keep girls distracted while the little boys took a peek under their skirts?

Ok I think I had one too many Kandos Kiddies this evening. It's fueling my imaginations wild. Blame the diamonds!

WHAT READERS SAY ABOUT Eating Kandos Kiddies, the Anal Retentive Way:

#22. Wow, just came across yr site... can't believe this... brought back memories man... never knew someone else would eat this particular chocolate this way! haha.. cool site man, will browse more soon! - trev, singapore
Posted by TS on 12-Feb-2007, 03:59 MYT

#21. Hi LANI! Hope you have a good time in Malaysia. If you do get Kandos, get plenty! They go quite fast!
Posted by Fairy on 18-Jan-2007, 13:56 MYT

#20. Hi!..been a long time since i last check your site..Good thing u got new features...I'd be visiting Malaysia on March this year..and im intrested to buy those KANDOS KIDDIE CHOCOLATES...maybe could bring it to Philippines to have my nieces and nephews tasted it..hehe!
Posted by Lani on 16-Jan-2007, 13:27 MYT

#19. hmmmmmmmm.. so yummy it is......
eating it is in my daily routine.....
Posted by happy on 12-Jan-2007, 16:57 MYT

#18. Really??? I used to eat the wrapper as well.
Posted by Shalitha Wijesundera on 13-Nov-2006, 02:53 MYT

#17. Holy Cow! I ate it that way too!LOL
Posted by Adlin - Website on 6-Feb-2006, 18:40 MYT

#16. Hahaha me too!
I ate them that way for yonks!

I also separated the aluminium part of the wrapper from the paper part. Eating Kandos Kiddies was such an adventure ^_^
Posted by nomad on 9-May-2005, 16:53 MYT

#15. omigosh!!!!!!!!
thought i was the only crazy one to eat Kandos like that. honestly, i always kept the diamond part for the last bite. classic!! and to collect all different wrappers, now that's precious!! IT'S THE KANDOS LEGACY, NO DOUBT!!!
Posted by maz on 9-Sep-2003, 23:04 MYT

#14.
Yaa....it's true. Kids were just craved on the toys actually, not the chocolate. Tak sedap langsung. Anyway, i praise you for the artistic work. Your website deserve to be in my favourite URLs list. A big clap for you girl....CLAP! CLAP! CLAP!
Posted by anen on 11-Aug-2003, 23:17 MYT

#13. anen, I've already written an article on Ding Dang and Tora a few weeks ago. I called it "Mysterious Toys in Cheesy Chocolate Boxes." Link
Posted by Fairy on 11-Aug-2003, 14:36 MYT

#12. E fairy....ape kate kau buat cerita pasal coklat "dendang" pulak. Allaaaaa...yg ada gambar popeye tuuuu
Posted by anen on 11-Aug-2003, 13:19 MYT

#11.
Eh eh...sama siot! aku pun makan macam tu gak. Tapi aku tak tau la pulak coklat ni wujud lagi
Posted by anen on 11-Aug-2003, 13:17 MYT

#10.
hehe..nape kite same ek! i also like to eat kados like that when i was a kid...know what...until now, the style eating kandos is still the same...
whatever la...
Posted by zatul on 8-Aug-2003, 11:09 MYT

#9. Found some new variation of the good ole Kandos choc.
Posted by MK84 on 29-Jul-2003, 02:57 MYT

#8. Lyna, tu lah, thank goodness for sundry shops man. I can't afford paying a fortune to come up with material to write about every week!

aslan: Umm, yeah? Got a problem with that? Korang jugak yang baca haha. Who's the weirder one? Reader or writer?
Posted by Fairy on 26-Jul-2003, 16:17 MYT

#7. fai, you scanned a Kandos diamond?
Posted by aslan on 26-Jul-2003, 16:16 MYT

#6. hahahaha...kandos, kandos. memang old time fav for kids dulu. but i did'nt know it still costs 10sen til now! ya know what? its a good thing ALL of ur junk food reviews ade kat sundry shop. macam kalau kite beli tu, ade xtra 10 or 20 cents, boleh beli lagi bende2 kecik. i particularly liked the wrappers and true what u've said, wrapper kandos tu memang tersanagtlah 'adevrtising!' aaah the ol', ol' days...
Posted by lyna - Website on 24-Jul-2003, 13:42 MYT

#5. hehe...fairy..i pun makan bender alah tuh camtuh gak..weird...
Posted by nerrirr on 21-Jul-2003, 14:06 MYT

#4. besides kandos ada satu lagi..tapi tak boleh recall sangat..cuma nya saiz kecik sama size dgn thumb je..yang tu selalu panggil 'coklat gajah' sebab ada elephant brand..kira cam kandos rival lah tapi mini size
Posted by aiie on 21-Jul-2003, 09:35 MYT

#3. Ahhhh.... Kandos... In the old days they use to have mini games or drawings inside the paper wrapper.
Posted by MK84 on 21-Jul-2003, 00:21 MYT

#2. haaa... kandos kandos. segi tiga kandos!
Posted by zacl on 20-Jul-2003, 03:20 MYT

#1. one of my fav chocs this would be when i was a kid, at that point tak kenal lagi apa itu cadbury and whats so great bout cadbury pun? hehe. the van houten mini chocs pun sedap, esp orange flavour, that seems to last forever.
Posted by Rafthah on 19-Jul-2003, 15:29 MYT

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